Hello earthlings,
It is I, Cosmo, your favorite extraterrestrial entrepreneur. And it is with heavy hearts that I must give you disturbing news. It seems that a human has been sneaking in and out of my establishment, rent-free, without paying so much as a single coin for parking!
Seriously, who does that? What the ⎅⎍☊☍⌇⋔⏃⋏⟟ is wrong with you primates?
Now, the staff is working double shifts just to hide that “human” smell before the customers notice it. Worse yet, on further inspection, we noticed something even more alarming. This human has been hacking our systems and uploading footage to a live communication system called Twitch. Disgraceful!
Using my incredibly oversized brain, I captured some of his transmissions. We do not tolerate piracy and hackers on our space station! Not unless I’m getting a piece of the action. We haven’t caught him yet, but I’m posting his image around the station along with this holographic footage I obtained.
This isn’t the first time he’s hacked us. I’ve found that he does this quite often, and tells his audience by hacking my invention Discord! I’m the only one who steals great ideas around here!
I urge you all to keep a close eye on him, and I’ve got a live feed that will update you when this scoundrel goes live on my space station: https://www.twitch.tv/bigsirgames!
If you’re interested in tracking him more closely, he posts here on my invention Discord when he starts his transmission: https://discord.gg/vDj6hrh.
This is a very serious matter, and to show you how very, very serious I am, I’m giving a reward of three space coins for his capture. Be on the lookout for this interloper, and let me know if you see him.
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